The husband is jealous of the children.
Husband is jealous of children: 5 ways to improve relations in the family.
With the advent of the baby, the couple’s family life is seriously changing. After all, they have to share love and attention with a third person — a small child. Often the husband begins to move away, to be jealous of his wife’s son or daughter. Why is this happening, and how to restore the balance of love and harmony in the family?
Compete for the love of your wife with your own child. Many young families manage to get into this wild situation, where novice fathers complicate the already difficult life of a “newborn mother” — their own wife-with insults and reproaches for abandonment. The woman on the hormonal waves storms give their maternal instinct and don’t notice how close to “suffer without love” was the cause of the incident, the best man in the world, the one that she decided to share the fate of the joys, sorrows, difficulties… but that’s the source of such problems, as a rule, is the man himself. Not yet mature as a husband and parent, he simply does not help his woman with a common child. The father of two kids, the loving and beloved husband of the famous Instagram blogger Lisa Miller, businessman Artemiy Miller, is convinced of this. Today, Lisa and Artemiy reveal the secrets of family harmony and argue that it is not love that needs to be distributed in the family, but responsibilities.
Female hormones and male instincts.
“The maternal instinct, which at the first stage of parenthood overshadows everything, women receive as a gift from nature along with the birth of their baby. This feeling of euphoria, amazing kinship with the child and understanding the meaning of life in general, we are partly given by hormones. But men, indeed, have a harder time-they go the rational way, as if they first get acquainted with their child, begin to study it, appreciate the moments of intimacy and only then love. At least, with our first child, with a daughter, it turned out that way, ” says Lisa.
“We were very much waiting for our daughter, preparing for her appearance and in general approached parenting very consciously, having given birth to our first child after seven years of marriage. And yet, when she appeared, I just accepted the fact. But love for her came gradually-from joint activities, worries, games and sleepless nights. But with the second, with the son, awareness and love collapsed immediately. Therefore, it is very important for parents to be psychologically prepared for this maternal and paternal happiness. The realization will come, but he needs help. You just need to understand once and for all: the child is your joint “work”, and from the very first moment. So, changing diapers-both, feeding-both, being on duty at night-both, “adds Artemiy ( read also:” The father’s instinct: how to awaken it and why it is important”).
The cure for jealousy: distribute responsibilities fairly.
According to Artemy, jealousy occurs when, after the birth of a baby, a woman completely devotes herself to the child, instead of paying attention to her husband. Here the problem is already in the father, because, most likely, he simply does not help his woman with a common child. After all, this is the wrong point of view, that a woman is supposedly obliged to do everything — and babysit, and look after the house, and take care of her husband and cherish. Just starting from infancy, both parents should raise and educate their child. Therefore, you need to divide the responsibilities in half. And when you are both involved in the process of raising and raising children-both of you-then there can be no state of jealousy towards your wife!